Oh, it is Saturday. I am so thankful it is Saturday. I am thankful for another week God gave us. He put some doozies in our lives this week, but I really do feel like it was his plan. If you read my post earlier this week, our son, Robert, lost his job. I want to be mad about that, but I just am not. I am scared for him because it is scary not having a job but let me tell you the background here. 2 years ago right about now, Robert was having a hard time with alcohol and he feels so guilty about it, but he knows there were times he was drinking so much that he was drunk at work. He got really good at hiding it as long as he kept drinking. Anyway, 2 years ago this month, he tried to quit cold turkey and ironically, the symptoms of that made everyone think he was drunk. His boss sent him home, and yes, he should have fired him that day and didn't. two days later, he started having seizures. We spent some very long days in the hospital that weekend. For a time, in the ER, they told me that he had probably had a stroke, that his liver probably had quit and the only thing that could save him was a liver transplant and he wasn't eligible because he very clearly had a drinking problem. They told me we were probably going to end up at either Vanderbuilt or Barnes where the best liver specialists in the country were, but they were not good chances he would make it. Then the alcohol level tests came back and they were all expecting him to be 4 to 5 times the legal limit and it was zero. That changed everything and they realized we were in the middle of detoxing so we spent the weekend in ICU drying out instead. He struggled a lot with staying away from it and in February of the next year, I received a call to come and get him because he was drunk at work. He should have been fired that day too. Instead, he went to rehab. And his boss let him come back to work after 2 months of rehab. Robert didn't understand why. So, fast forward to a few weeks ago. Robert is still working through recovery and has recently started seeing a new doctor that started changing some of his meds for depression. Little did we realize one has really bad side effects and actually makes you appear drunk. So, when we realized it, we got him started to get off of it, but you have to titrate down. And Robert's boss had enough and let him go. He was seriously not fired for being drunk on the job though, in fact, he had been sober for quit some time with no slips. Now, here is the thing, Robert's guilt about all of this is through the roof, but he would go to work everyday worrying about keeping his job because he felt so guilty for the things that happened in the past. We had talked about him changing jobs and having a clean slate with someone he could do his best and not have the daily past hanging over him but he was in a comfort zone and so he stayed. I think we all knew God was pushing him to get out of there because there were too many memories but new things are scary. I totally, 100% believe that right now, Robert is trying to live for the Lord more than he ever has in his life and when you do that two things happen. 1. The devil is constantly knocking at the door because he knows he had him once, and he wants him back. and 2. This is the Lord's will. Yes, it would have been easier to get another job if he hadn't been let go from the first one but I know my son is a really good mechanic and there are lots of people out there looking for really good mechanics. I know he has many jobs that the book says should take 8 hours and he can pull them off in 4 and it be perfect. It is going to be a bit on the scary side going through a few weeks without a paycheck but we have a plan and I am really at peace with everything and I think he is too. We actually want to get him totally off this bad medicine before he starts a new job and he has had a road trip planned with his dad for months to go see his granddad and that happens 2 weeks from today, so we are all taking a reset and he is going to start applying for jobs this week and hopefully might have something to come home from the trip to. But if he doesn't, we know God has the plan and we are going to go with it.
So, I am veering off of James today with all of this, and taking the Bible Study to my theme verse through all of this. We are going to Jeremiah 29:11. This is what we are living by.
Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Highlight=plans to prosper you and not to harm you, hope and a future. Explain= God wants us to excel, he wants us to be happy here on earth but we also want to realize, it doesn't matter what happens here because there is part of our future as Christians that is already sealed. The end is good, no matter what happens here. Apply= it would be so easy to look at this from the other side and say, why did God let Robert get fired and to get mad about it. You want to know what I got mad about this week? My dad dying. I spent just a few minutes thinking about the fact that if my dad were alive and well, he and Robert, who are so much alike would have probably started their own business and Robert would have never started down the alcohol path to start with. But then reality hit and I know God doesn't make mistakes so I know what is happening and what happened with my dad was meant to be. There is no place in the Bible that says this is going to be easy, but it will be worth it. Respond= Lord, help us through this time in our lives of change. It feels like there is change going on in our family from every angle, my work, Andrew's health, Robert's future, Mom's health. It's a lot, but we've got You and we know You've got this and You are working all things out for Your glory.
We have a lot of reorganizing to do in the coming weeks but so far, we are getting there. Robert and Andrew got his smaller tool box earlier this week, and Garrett, one of Robert's lifelong friends has a tow truck and they went and got the monster box yesterday and it is safe and sound in my garage so he is done there. So, off to new chapters, and seeing what God has in store. He's working all things for our good. I am leaving you with a song today as this one has been on our minds a lot lately.
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