A Little Psychology

 Good Saturday morning!!

I am heading a different direction than normal this week, but I promise, we will get back to my normal routine by the end of this. 

I did something this week and I am a little hesitant to share, but I have to tell you about it to get to my point. 

One of my best friends had a picture on fb recently and it was very clear she had lost a good amount of weight since the last time I had seen her. You all know I am struggling beyond belief right now so I asked her what she was doing. Her answer was Noom. I decided why not. I had been seeing it for some time but figured I was already paying for WW, so how could it be that much different. I have been on it a week, and yes, I have lost about 2 lbs. I am heavy enough that a lot of times, when I start a new "diet" I can lose a lot of weight the first week, but at least half comes back the second week and that just blows it for me. This is different. I have truly ate differently this week and I feel my two pounds could turn into 4 next week and so on. I am learning foods aren't off limits anymore, I just need more moderation. 

Anyway, with Noom, you have daily classes. One of the first classes was on T.F.A.R. Yesterday, we had a staff learning day with Teresa McCloy, from the REALIFE Process ( www.therealifeprocess.com ), Teresa also shared T.F.A.R. I am one of those people that think when things show up in my life more than once in a week, maybe I should really be listening. (Did you know most of the things God tells us in the Bible, He tells us more than once?--think about how many times FEAR NOT is there- 365!!)

Anyway, T.F.A,R stands for Thought, Feeling, Action, and Result.

They all work together and that Result is going to be based on the first three. And the whole experience is based on the thought you had and how it made you feel.

I have realized this week that sometimes I do some really stinkin' thinkin' towards myself. My thoughts can very easily have a lot of can't and nevers in them. Such as, I screwed up and had a donut this morning, I have ruined my day, I have ruined my chances of ever losing weight and I am a loser. How does that make me feel? Well, like a loser! and what do I do? Well, that's where things can get interesting. Depending on the day, I will do one of two things, I will see if anyone wants to go out to lunch, because I blew it, I might as well keep going and drowned myself in chips and cheese OR I swing the total opposite and decide not to eat the rest of the day to make up for it. That normally results in me being hungry at supper and overeating again. Either way, it was not the donut that ruined my progress, it was my feelings and actions.

I guess a little commercial for NOOM, They had me set a date of something coming up. HOPEFULLY, we get to start traveling for work again and we have a conference in June. NOOM asked for a date of something important coming up and gave me an amount of weight they BELIEVED I could lose by then. They are making me believe it too. So yesterday morning, when the donuts were sitting there, I decided I wanted to be more comfortable on the plane worse than I wanted the donut and that I didn't want to adjust my eating plan again. When I had ordered our lunches from Jimmy Johns, I had estimated in NOOM and saw that if I ate all my JJ's lunch, I would have very few calories to work with for supper and knowing that my worst time of day is from 5-9 pm, decided to cut my sandwich, chips, and cookie in half (bonus, I have to go into the office today and I have lunch already there!)/
Do you see how my thoughts, feelings and actions gave me the results I wanted?

This doesn't have to be about food. It can be about life in any form. Do you get your feelings hurt because you think you got left out of something? Or because you feel someone did something intentional to hurt you? I do this myself too.  I remember years ago, someone I had always considered a friend confronted me about something that had happened YEARS before. At first, I had no idea what she was talking about and then I started remembering the conversation. She thought  I was criticizing her and I was very truly talking about myself. I still feel bad that she was upset with me for years over something that wasn't true. It was her thoughts and feelings, and it was sadly not reality at all. I would give anything if she would have asked me that night instead of letting it fester. 

So, this week, when you start having negative thoughts, try reframing, one step at a time. It is starting to be a game changer for me.

And of course, the obvious Bible verse to take home this week is Philippians 4:13. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. Not some, all. I have decided to make Christ more present as I make decisions and as I think, I want him to help me with those thoughts. I figure if I am not looking to Christ for what thoughts are real, Satan may be helping out the negatives. 

I am leaving you with Zack Williams Rescue Story, because the chorus that repeats, You never gave up on me reminds me that God doesn't give up on us, so we shouldn't give up on ourselves!

Have a great week!