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Self Care Isn't Selfish: Part 1

 Learning to Rest Before We Run Empty

Happy Saturday! It has been a big, scary week for me! I started a new adventure, pitched an idea to our tourism council that means a new project and hosted a meeting yesterday that one of funders experience. I am really, really glad for a change of pace this weekend and I am taking full advantage. IT led me to this next topic and another series so we can break it down.

Today we’re starting a new four-part series called Self-Care Isn’t Selfish. Over the next four weeks, we’re going to look at what self-care really means and why it matters, then dig a little deeper into caring for the three parts of ourselves that God has entrusted to us—our bodies, our minds, and our spirits.

For a long time, I think I misunderstood self-care. I thought taking care of myself was something I could get to after everything else was done—after the work was finished, after everyone else was taken care of, after the house was handled, the responsibilities were met, and everybody who needed something from me had gotten it.

The problem is, “after everything else” never comes. There is always one more thing to do, one more person who needs us, one more responsibility waiting. Sometimes we don’t realize how empty we have become until we are exhausted.

I’ve learned some of my biggest lessons about self-care through exhaustion. I’m beginning to understand that taking care of myself isn't selfish. In fact, God never asked us to run ourselves completely empty in order to prove that we love Him or other people.

Look at what Jesus told His disciples in Mark 6:31b: “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

I love the circumstances surrounding that verse. The disciples were busy. People were coming and going. There was so much happening that Scripture says they didn’t even have a chance to eat. Sound familiar? Jesus didn't look at them and say, Work harder. People need you. He said, Come away. Rest.

Jesus offers that same invitation to us in Matthew 11:28: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Notice that He doesn't tell the weary to try harder. He tells them to come to Him.

Self-Care Is More Than Bubble Baths

Somewhere along the way, “self-care” became associated with spa days, vacations, candles, manicures, and treating ourselves. And those things can certainly be enjoyable! But that's not really what I'm talking about.

True self-care is recognizing that God created us as whole people. We have a body that needs nourishment, movement, sleep, and care. We have a mind that needs rest, boundaries, healthy thoughts, and sometimes permission to put something down. And most importantly, we have a soul that desperately needs time with God. When one of those areas is continually neglected, eventually the others feel it too.

That's why over the next few weeks, I want to spend some time talking about all three: body, mind, and spirit. Not because we need three more areas of our lives to perfect, and certainly not because we need another checklist. But because these are gifts God has entrusted to us, and caring for them allows us to live, love, serve, and follow Him more fully.

Maybe You Need Permission

Maybe you're the person everyone depends on. Maybe saying “no” makes you feel guilty. Maybe sitting down when there is still work to be done makes you feel lazy. Maybe you've become so accustomed to being tired, stressed, overwhelmed, or running on empty that it simply feels normal.

Then perhaps this is what you need to hear today: You do not have to earn rest.

Jesus Himself rested. He withdrew from crowds. He spent time alone with His Father. And He invited His disciples to step away from the work and rest too. If Jesus recognized the need for rest in Himself and His disciples, why do we sometimes believe we should be able to live without it?

One Small Change

I don't want you to overhaul your life this week. Instead, I want you to ask yourself three simple questions: What does my body need right now? What does my mind need right now? What does my soul need right now?

Then choose one small act of care and actually do it. Maybe your body needs an earlier bedtime. Maybe your mind needs you to say no to something. Maybe your soul needs ten quiet minutes with God before you pick up your phone. Maybe you need to make the appointment you've been putting off. Or maybe you simply need to sit on the porch, breathe, pray, and be still for a few minutes without feeling guilty about what isn't getting done.

Whatever it is, remember this: Self-care isn't choosing yourself instead of others. It's caring for the person God created so that you are able to keep loving Him and loving others well.

Jesus is still saying, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Maybe today is a good day to accept His invitation.

Next week: Self-Care Isn’t Selfish — Caring for Your Body

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