When I was in about 6th grade, I decided I wanted to try to be in the McDonald's All-American band. Although it would have been neat to be in, my main reason was, they marched in the Rose Bowl Parade, the granddaddy of them all and I really wanted to march in the Rose Bowl parade. It just so happened that my junior year of high school, I did just that, with our own high school marching band. I never imagined such a thing could happen. Here's the deal, and something you need to remember. The thing I wanted was to be in that parade. I thought I saw the only way to do it.
God saw another way. Remember that.
I still have a list in my head of things I would like to do before I die. One of those things is to play in a pit band for a musical. Last week, I get a message from one of my high school band directors asking if I would like to be in the pit band for Lincoln Trail College's production of Into the Woods. I was both honored and mortified. The funny thing was I was so excited and I knew the band geek in me walking around to my co-worker's offices would probably produce a lot of blank stares and people trying to be happy for me but not really getting it. So, I texted two of my bff's from high school, and of course, fellow band geeks. And yes, they were excited for me.
I have spent a lot of time this last week dealing with the horrified feelings. Sandra told me they were doing a run through last Thursday and would I like to come and get my music, watch, and follow along. Let me tell you something, over 30 years ago, this woman could read my fears like a book. She still can. Side Note: One of the biggest fears in my life was the day that she accompanied our choir for a funeral, I was the choir director. Having to direct her is on that top ten list of scary things, but it was fine.
So, Thursday night, I decided to go straight from work to Robinson. I had also decided I would run the interstate over to Marshall, grab me a sandwich there so I could eat on my way down Rt. 1 and not end up sitting someplace in my car eating. It was still going through my head, "What are you thinking? You can't do this, you will never keep up. that music will be too hard, and every other various doubt you can think of. Then, I passed a church. God bless church signs.
This one said, Faith is the difference between Cowards and Calebs. Wow.......I was out in the middle of nowhere and God was speaking to me so loudly that I really wondered if I drove back by there if that sign would REALLY say that.
Just in case you don't know the story, it is found in Numbers 13 and 14. Instead of giving you the whole scripture, I will leave a link for you HERE.
The just of the story though is Moses sent 12 spies to scout out Canaan. The land God promised the Israelites. When they came back, 10 of them said that the land was absolutely wonderful, flowing with milk and honey BUT the people there were too big, too strong, and too scary and they were too afraid of them to move forward. Two of them, Caleb and Joshua, knew God wanted them to have this land and God would take care of them. There is one passage where God says to Moses, “How long will these people treat me like dirt? How long do they refuse to trust me?" So, here I am, on this deserted highway, realizing God put me here, so I could read this sign so I could get over myself. Here He is handing me something that I have wanted for ages and I am ruining it for myself because I have no faith.
That saying, "If God leads you to it, He will lead you through it" works in good stuff too.
So, I went to practice that night, and I was so relieved when I saw the music, and even more relieved that most of the time I could follow along and see exactly where I was at and what I was supposed to be doing it. I am still nervous but I am more excited. And the most excited that something I have wanted to do, God handed to me and said, "Here, this is for you."
We, (I, anyway) seem to be in the habit of asking God for things, sometimes even things that seemed too far fetched to even imagine and, even though I have it in my head "the only way that could happen is..." God pops something down on you and says, "I love you, and here is what you wanted, and no, it didn't happen the way YOU thought, but it happened the way I KNEW". Yes, I hear him say things like that to me all the time.
I am leaving you with What Faith Can Do, from Kutless. Yes, it is another favorite, imagine that!
Have a beautiful week and when God blesses your socks off, don't doubt, just praise Him!
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