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Saturday, April 17, 2021

Wondering About the Whys

 Good morning! I made it! A couple hours later than I planned, but still...The cat was snuggly this morning, so I think he was telling me I needed that extra sleep, lol.

This week has been a good week at our house, my mom hasn't been in the wheelchair since Monday, and is weaning very quickly from her braces for both her arm and leg. I think she is doing great. We start therapy Monday. My father-in-law had a scare last weekend that would have just seemed like too much to handle since we lost my brother-in-law on Easter. Fortunately, from the time he left the little ER in the town they live in  to the time he got to the actual hospital, the diagnosis changed drastically. We had called our church's prayer chain. I have no doubt but what God moved a mountain because his people prayed. I have gotten a lot accomplished and so have the guys, good week in a nutshell. One of those that you just kinda live through and don't really realize how thankful you should be. Robert had a pinched nerve for a few days so he was going through an incredible backache but it came loose in the middle of the night, or better description, God loosened it in the middle of the night.

At the same time that our life was pretty calm for a change, I have friends going through horrific storms. I always feel so helpless when this happens and of course my first question is Why, God? We all know all the answers to this, it rains on the just and the unjust, God's ways are perfect, and we know he sees the bigger picture. Even though we know all these things, it doesn't make it easy and I think most people are like me, and wonder what I am doing wrong that God puts me through this trial.  I have had times this week that one of my friends reach out in distress and I literally hit my knees, begging God to change things. And deep down inside, I know He will. The hard part is, He will do it in His time, not mine. 

And then we have the fact that God sometimes says no and it isn't a "maybe later, grow some more" it is a hard no. There are things in life that I have always wondered how God works out. Have you ever thought about just how complex God's job is? When two people, or maybe more, are praying for the same thing, such as a job offer, more than likely, one person is going to get a yes, and the others no. Being part of a team that hires people, I feel bad when someone calls back, or reaches out multiple times after a job interview. We know they want the job, we know they feel they are the right person for the job; yet, we don't feel they are. You could spend days contemplating the intricacies of God's thoughts. If He thought this person was right for the job, would He work on us as the hiring managers? I think that is yes because I prayfully consider our candidates, but then we have hired people that turn out to not be the right person at all and we have hired people that we wondered if they could really handle the job we gave them and they not only handled it, they knocked it out of the park and moved up in the agency.  

We had a lot of times when I was growing up that we would pray and we would watch God move. There were nights we prayed that my dad would live through the night when we were told he wouldn't, and he did. Same with a friend of mine, we were told if she did live, she would have major brain issues and have to have therapy, and may never be the same and the next day, she was back to her normal self. Tons of prayers went up. But I have also watched a wreck shatter the hopes and dreams of a beautiful boy that had a personality I could only imagine was a lot like my Robert has now. That one of a really good guy, with a great personality. He now spends his life in a wheelchair with a traumatic brain injury, and I have to ask why. And I get told, I'm not God, and He is the only one that really knows why. 

My first hard no was when one of the boys I grew up next to was in the hospital for, if I remember right a gallbladder surgery, it was something very routine and should have been an in and out. We were on our way to the State Fair and got a call that a blood clot had formed and caused him to have a heart attack and they were working on him. We stopped the car and we sat and prayed. We were still sitting there praying when Mom called back and said he was gone. And I, to this day, can't even type this without tears welling and it running though my head, why? Why was it such a hard no? And unlike the job scenario, there were tons of people praying for the same outcome for the same person, we all wanted the same thing, and God said no. I am still a little upset with Him over that, and that is okay. We are human. I know I don't want to be bitter with God about it, but I think it is okay to say I don't understand and I don't like it. At the same time, I do know I have to trust in God. He is good, all the time. I prayed a lot for peace after that. And I found it.

Trust and peace have to go hand in hand, peace is the outcome of trust.  We have to learn this. 

Romans 15:13    May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

And there is our answer, one verse, 31 words. May God fill us with joy and peace AS we TRUST in Him. and the output is that we will overflow with hope.  I love this verse and remind myself, the more I trust, the more joy, peace and hope I have, and when you have it, you can pass it on. 

And that, my friend is what we are here for.

 When I was growing up, there was a book always handy at our house, it was called, "Let Go, and Let God". So, so hard to do, but it is the secret to finding that peace. I am always handing things to God and then taking them back. I can just hear him saying, "Seriously? You don't think I can handle this?" and then I hear him saying, "You think you can take care of this better than I can? Really?" So I am learning to put it at the feet of Jesus and leave it there. I remember times in our junior high AWANA class I would sit a bowl of chips in the center of the room and tell them all not to touch it. LEAVE. IT. THERE.

And that, my friend is what we are here for. 

I could go on, but I just got to the point, and will just leave this here for you to ponder. 

This song has been on my mind a lot this week, we are going to sing it tomorrow morning for Worship service. It goes perfectly with what I have been saying.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow the hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. 

Mindy






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