Suitcases

One of the main things I have to do today is packed to go to Springfield. If you have known me long at all, you know I'm getting ready to go to my favorite conference of the year. This is mainly because of the family of distinction banquet that will happen tomorrow night. This is the night when we honor some of our biggest successes from the past year. Most of these people have work themselves right out of needing our assistance. Some have found their dream jobs, some have went back to school and are still exploring all the opportunities they never believe they would have, and some have even started their own businesses, their own successful businesses.

As I get ready to pack I think about the song Suitcases by Dara Maclean. I know you probably get tired of hearing this, but it is one of my favorites. This song is all about dropping life's heavy burdens and giving them to Jesus. I have to tell you as much as I enjoy the conference and enjoy getting to go, one of the things I dread is dragging those suitcases around. Usually, because as hard as I try I end up with three or four bags for a three day trip.I truly get the part of the song that says you can't run when you're holding suitcases.

Sometimes we have a habit of carrying around our past like big ole suitcases, things that we have already asked the Lord forgiveness for, and already received forgiveness, the devil keeps dredging up. There have been days just this week that he has made me feel really bad about myself. But Jesus tells us to put down those burdens, Matthew 11:28 says: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." The hotel I will be at this weekend, you have to go to the second floor to register- they have escalators but still, you drag your bags from the car, then into the lobby, then up the escalator, to the registration desk, get your key, then get on an elevator and go up to your room. By the time I get there, with my big bag, my little bag, my computer bag, and my purse, I am SO ready to not be carrying them. I don't think we always realize, life's suitcases can wear us down just as much.

It's not until you truly learn to hand your problems to Jesus, that you physically feel that relief. I have gotten to see that flood of relieve wash over clients before. I have seen one little instance, like an unexpected hospital stay, or car repair turn into a major burden for our clients. With my job, this results in a utility bill that they have not been able to pay. When I tell them that we have taken care of it, more times than not., you can just hear the relief in their voice. I made the statement a few weeks ago that one sincere, " God bless you" can make my day. It is a good feeling to know He had used me and my job to make someones life better.

On that note, I want to remind you that the Bible also tells us to carry each others burdens. Galatians 6:2 says: "Carry each others burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." So as not to take this out of context, let me tell you what this is talking about. Verse 1 tells us that if we see someone going astray, we are to help them get back on track. It seems to me like there are Christians that get this in the wrong perspective anymore. They see this as an opportunity to tell others what they're doing wrong. I don't believe for a second that is what God means for us to do. I also think God thought that might happen. In Luke 11, Jesus is talking to the Pharisees. These were the so called religious leaders at the time who were much more concerned with building their own reputation and stature than that of following God's plan. In verse 46, He says, "And you experts in the law, woe to you, because you load people down with burdens they can hardly carry, and you yourselves will not lift one finger to help them." Yep, I am afraid I see Christians doing this every day. It is so easy to judge other people, and to top it off, it makes their lives seem better for a bit. This drives me nuts! 

I believe the first thing you should do when you see someone going astray is pray. Pray for them and pray that God will help you see the right way to help. Do you see a friend who is starting to go places and do things that aren't really the best thing for a Christian to be doing? How about instead of telling them about it, invite them to do something with you? Don't mention what else they've been doing unless they ask. It is easy to tell someone they are doing it all wrong when that's all you got to do. Let me give you an easy example. Let's look at a elementary student solving a math problem. The first time he tries, the teacher says, "no,that's wrong, you need to do it right" and then walks away. The child has no idea what he is doing wrong and so he does it again; and again, the teacher comes back and tells him he is wrong and walks away. Because the teacher never offered him any direction, he just continues to do the problem wrong. After a while, he doesn't even remember he was doing it wrong and just considers it must be okay. On this example it is very easy to see, the teacher is really the one doing it wrong. So if you are seeing your friend doing something wrong and all you provide them with is, "you are wrong" what good did it really do? 

I have learned that I am much more blessed helping people than I think I could ever be looking down on them.

Even though our grants are government based and we are not a religious organization, I will tell you, many of my friends I work with throughout the state are Christians. We all feel that calling to help others be their best. At the same time, this group helps me be my best too.

This week my challenge to you is to help carry those burdens and to complete the picture, all we really need to do is help others carry their burdens TO JESUS. He will take them, 

My final verse:  1 Peter 5:7 "Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you."

He cares for you, and your neighbor, and that person down the road. And he wants us to help carry their suitcases to Him too. 

So here is the song. I love this song....

 

World Changers

To say life has been crazy at our workplace the last few months would be a grand understatement. Crazy as it was, things got a whole lot more chaotic the first day of April. There are 15 people out in the offices taking energy assistance applications and two of us in the main office trying to keep up with all the oddities that comes along with that fact that no two circumstances are even exactly alike. There have been days I have probably been close to tears and I know the girls I mentioned earlier have been in the same boat. The thing is though, we all have decisions to make about these clients and applications, and those decisions affect peoples lives--lots of people.

Last week, I attended a meeting with other LIHEAP program coordinators from across the state. Several of these people are good friends of mine and the night before the actual meeting, some of us got together. I was asked a question that was supposed to be followed with a decision and I said I was done making decisions for the day. My friend laughed and said they had just been discussing decision fatigue. I understood perfectly. Decisions I make every day affect peoples lives--lots of people.

Yesterday, I attended a meeting of the Policy Advisory Council for our program. I am not a member, but an invited guest, and am considered an interested party. Before that meeting we talked about how many members of this particular council doesn't come to the meetings. It is irritating to me that they have been assigned this responsibility and consistently find better things to do with their time. That's really another story though. The real story is, in this meeting, decisions are being made that affect peoples lives---lots of people.

I read an article not too long ago about how many hundreds of decisions we all make each day. Your first decision of the day comes when you wake up, do you lay there, or do you get up? What are you wearing for the day? What are your plans for the day? What are you fixing for dinner? What are you taking for lunch? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

I have spent a lot of my time this year watching what is going on in the General Assembly as well as Congress. I have truly found a new respect for some of our Senators and Representatives. During campaign season, you see these people and you wonder (I did anyway) how much they are really wanting to do things to change things or if they are just wanting the prestige of being a legislator.
I found out that more of them are in it to be world changers than I thought. That too involved a lot of decisions.

I look at all of these examples and they point to people who could be consider world changers. But the thing is, when each one of us gets out of bed each morning, we made a conscience decision. We can either dedicate this day to our Lord, or we can take a pass. Do you realize that every time you decide living your day for God is too much work, you are making the devil so very happy.  I seriously believe every one of us have more opportunities to be world changers than we know.

Many of us have heard the story about the boy who was befriended on his way home from school one night, he had plans to kill himself that weekend and this person taking time to talk to him and to become his friend changes his life, literally.

You truly never know when just a smile at someone could change their day. I have been the recipient of a pay-it-forward before, and it is such a cool feeling when you pull up to the drive through window and find out the car in front of you has paid for your coffee. Once it was even our Sheriff. I also love leaving enough for someone else to get a cup of coffee and tell the girl to just give it to someone who looks like they need it.

I am only giving you one verse this week.

2 Thessalonians 3:13 says, "But ye, brethren, be not weary in well doing.".

That means you need to do good every chance you get. Every. Chance, You, Get.

Don't let an opportunity pass you by. You never know whose life you might change.

 It doesn't matter if you are in an official capacity to make decisions that affect other lives or if you are waiting on a customer at the local restaurant;  your words, your actions, and you just being you could change someone's life.

We see the starfish poem a  lot in my business, because a lot of times, we changes the world one person at a time.

Just in case you don't know it...

I leave you with Matthew West's World Changers. I LOVE this song, ALMOST as much as his song Do Something (feel free to look that one up too). Point is, we ALL have the opportunity to change the world, and it is what Jesus wants us to do.

When God Says It's Time to Change

 We recently had a family friend who lost her job. When I was told the reason that she was given, I didn’t believe the accusation but I did remind her there are reasons for everything. I have had that on my mind a lot this week. I lost a job once, and at the time, I felt heartbroken. The thing is though, if I hadn’t lost that job, I wouldn’t have went to Effingham the next day to sign up for unemployment, I wouldn’t have decided to go to Walmart to see if my friend who worked there would like to go to lunch with me. I wouldn’t have had that friend tell me they were looking for help, I wouldn’t have filled out that application, I wouldn’t have had the job interview and I wouldn’t have went to work there. I know now all those things happened because God made Andrew, this guy from Oklahoma, just for me. On the same token, the night before Andrew was to move to Texas to a new store, the last minute decision was made that he really needed to go to Effingham, IL. Someplace he had never heard of, and quite frankly wasn’t overly fond of until he met me. God truly works in mysterious ways.

I don’t know if I was supposed to be doing something different at that time or not, I do know God had a plan though. Sometimes His plans just fall into place, other times; I believe he tries  to nudge us into doing what He wants us to without the drastic measures. Andrew and I both feel like he should have left Walmart years before he did. He was unhappy but when I would say, “you need to look for something else”, his answer was, “but it is the only thing I’ve ever done”. Well, no, it wasn’t,  It was the only thing he had ever been paid to do. When God forced the issue, Andrew turned that thing he really did love doing into what he is getting paid to do. We hated that it came about the way it did but looking back, had we taken the same road earlier, it would have been much easier.

I have a friend who is a pastor. Years ago, he felt God telling him to leave where he was at and start a new church. He argued with God because he was comfortable where he was. God finally put things in place to where my friend’s decision was made for him. He has admitted he would have saved himself a lot of heartache had he just answered, “Yes, Lord” when God started talking.

That is the root of this week’s devotional. We have all heard Jeremiah 29:11—For I know the plans I have for you”  declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Have you ever noticed if you only read that verse, you have not one but two open-ended quotes? Sometimes we have a habit of pulling one verse out of a passage and it changes the overall meaning. While I don’t believe that is the case here, I want to fill in the verses around this verse.

Back up and start at verse 10. This is what the Lord says:  “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you.” Declares the Lord, “ plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, “

That takes you through part of verse 14, and it continues but I just wanted you to see the context as to what was going on. The Israelites were in captivity. Why? Because they stopped listening to God. I get so wrapped up in my OWN thoughts sometimes that I am guilty of this today. Sometimes I think God does things as a way to get my attention. I have a very bullheaded son. He gets it in his head he knows what I am thinking, and why I would make decisions  I’ve made. Most of the time, he was wrong. And I have used the very phrase, “You aren’t listening to me!”. Sometimes with more force and bit louder than I really care to admit, but facts are facts. When I can’t get him to physically listen, I have been known to take an action that makes it easier for him to hear me. The action that worked best when Robert was younger?  Standing him in the corner. I think some of the things that happen to us when we are trying to make God’s way fit into our plans are the Godly result of being stood in the corner. He finds a way to get our attention.

Let’s face it, if we would have just done as we were told the first time, we could have possibly prevented the bad stuff, or the “this hurts me more than it does you” times straight from God’s mouth.

So, this week, I’m hoping you concentrate on listening to what God is telling you. Is he telling you to move on? Is he telling you to step out in faith and do something that seems scary? Have you ever thought about the fact that at some point in time, what is now your comfort zone probably really wasn’t? Case in point, some people’s biggest fear is public speaking. It isn’t mine. I would love to say it never has been, but I very clearly remember the first night I held computer classes for work. The first person walked in, looked at me and said, “I’m so nervous, I think I’m going to throw up”, I replied that I was right there with her and I do remember how nervous I used to be. This week, a coworker put me on the spot to speak at a meeting we were having. I don’t know how many people were there, I would say at least 100. I told her I was going to support her from the back row but that wasn’t the way it ended up. Deal was, it truly wasn’t a big deal. Speaking in public has stopped being something outside of my comfort zone. And I know I have grown because of it.

 Now, saying all of this, yesterday, I went to grab a sandwich at lunch. My van needed gas so I pulled into Casey’s. While I was pumping gas, I was approached by this girl with two pamphlets. She told me she just wanted to share information with me about God. I was shocked, took the pamphlets and said thank you so she would walk away.  Yep, still in the process of being convicted over that one.  So many things I should have said, and I didn’t.  Between the fact that I didn’t even say, “I’m a Christian” and the fact that I keep thinking, “wow, what if more of us did that?”.  Yep……having an issue. And yes, I am sure that was God telling me to do more and I just failed.

So, I personally am going to work on telling 3 strangers about Christ this week. I am going to also tell you, I may start quite small. I may leave a tract in a public bathroom, and it may end up in the trash, but then again, it might not. I may leave one on the table with a tip, I’ve always thought that was neat but never done it. Notice, I’m not starting with confronting someone at the gas station….baby steps.  I have had people tell me that they love this blog, and love that I am doing it, but let’s face it, even though it is more than I was doing last year, it’s pretty easy to hide behind a computer screen.

The last two paragraphs were freebies, trying to get back on track of really listening to what God is telling us, I have picked Love and the Outcome's He is With Us because even though He may have to drag us kicking and screaming sometimes, the one thing we are sure of is He is right there with us all the way.

The Voice of Truth

So, I am doing something I never really do. It is 20 after four on Saturday morning and I am writing my post for the week. It's funny how God works. I normally write my post on Friday morning and then put them up on Friday night to auto publish on Saturday morning. Because I was going to be leaving early yesterday, I started my post on Thursday. For the first time since I had started this, God had not sent me a real clear message of what he wanted me to say. This morning it was clear he was waiting on yesterday. I normally have a friend that rides up to Springfield with me, but yesterday; she had other plans. As much as I missed her company, I realized God had a reason for me to go by myself yesterday. I have been running at a crazy pace and even though I spend every morning in prayer and Bible study, it wasn't two hours of just having time alone with God. We honestly got a lot of things worked out that I really didn't know I was having problems with until I had that time alone.

One of the first things we worked out was my fears of what is going on with my mom. It seems since October there has been one thing after another and we still have got some issues going on that nobody can find an answer to. I made the statement last week that one of my first fears was something happening to my mom, I'm afraid one of my fears right now is something happening to my mom. The latest that has happened was she had three skin cancers removed two weeks ago, infection set in and last week instead of just taking the stitches out, they took the stitches out and left an inch and a half by an inch hole open in her arm. She and I have spent the last week packing it daily. I have spent the last week worried that I was doing it wrong, that I wasn't smart enough to do this. You now probably can figure out why my blog is named what it is.I was honestly shocked when the doctor didn't reprimand me for the way her arm looked. In fact he seemed to think it was doing OK, and now we are packing it every other day and using a different substance. My mom joked around last Friday night that I have a new hat, wound technician.

The next thing God and I really talked about was the fear, the constant fear, that I have had for the last four years. Four years ago on Thursday, Robert totaled his car. I had never seen a vehicle in the shape his car was in and the person walked away. I truly, for the first time since he was little really thought about the fact that we almost lost him. Him having to drive 40 miles a day to work on a road where that I drive too and see all the stupid things that happen. I hadn't really realized how much of the time I spend with my guard up waiting for somebody to call me and tell me he's been in a wreck. I was looking back through my own journal and realized that the anniversary of a good friend of his dying in a car accident was in the last few days too. I had never noticed that. It was the first one of Robert's friends to get killed, and it shook this house to the core.The one thing that each one of us treasured though was the fact that we knew this boy was saved. It's still does not take away the loss we all feel. As much as I would love to say that I accomplished not having as much fear of losing my son, I'm going to chalk that up to "that's the way God made me" and I think he wired every mom with a certain amount of worry for her children.
 

Thinking about Roberts wreck though made me think about that week. That was truly a week that I felt like my life was spiraling out of control. Robert and the wreck on Saturday, and Andrew lost his job the following Thursday. Anybody that knows me knows that I constantly waited on those shoes to drop and the fact that everything happened in less than seven days was just crazy. Looking back though, I have to tell you I still am very sure that it was one of the best things that ever happened to Andrew. If  I could get over the fear of not having constant work, I would say it was the best thing that ever happened to all of us. I am assuming that with time, that confidence will come. Right at this moment, he has more work lined up than he ever has. The main thing though, is he is a totally different person than he was that day four years ago and I love that.

As Jesus and I were talking, we moved onto my own job. I love my job with all my heart and feel God put me on the earth to do exactly what I'm doing. As with everything else, there are changes constantly and I am slowly losing all of my mentors to retirement. It feels funny because when I first started, I had all these moms; now I am becoming one of the moms.
This has been an absolute crazy week at work and I have spent most of the time juggling multiple issues. As hectic as it gets I truly am living my dream. I had a client very sincerely say, "God bless you" this week and it truly does something to me when that happens. It reminds me exactly why I do everything I do. When I was younger we were taught that our primary job as Christians here on earth is to spread the gospel, to tell the untold millions and to help bring others to Christ. We sometimes forget that we are also supposed to be ministering to other Christians. 2 Corinthians 12:19b says "We have been speaking in the sight of God as those in Christ; and everything we do, dear friends, is for your strengthening." 

Just a reminder that it is our jobs to build each other's faith. 
 

I get amazed at the things I get to do as part of my job. God has given me an amazing life. Sometimes I get so caught up in the day-in, day-out, that I forget just how awesome He is.  I also get those voices in my head that says I don't deserve what I have and that tomorrow I could lose it all. The truth is, here on earth, that is true. But the one thing I can't lose is my eternal home. It is ready and waiting, no matter what happens here. When I was in my early 20's and single, I was ready to go any time the Lord would have called me home. I still am, don't get me wrong, but I also look forward to seeing what the future holds for Robert as well as for me and Andrew as I feel there is a lot more down the road for us. 

I guess after rambling around on all these things, my main point comes back to the blessing I got yesterday morning when Jesus had time to replace all those voices that the Devil had put in my head with the thoughts, encouragements and love that He wanted there. Psalm 1:1-2 kept running through my mind as this conversation was going on. 

Blessed is the man that walketh not in the council of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in His law he doth meditate day and night. 

So, several things: Find some time to really get alone with Jesus, it does the soul good. I feel like I had my own little revival yesterday. Look for what God is trying to tell you, not what the Devil is trying to discourage you with. Finally, thank Him daily for where you are now, count your blessings, and if you are having trouble finding them, look around. If you are looking to Him, he will show you blessings. 

No matter what happens here, if you are a Christian, you have a home in Heaven that nobody can take from you. If you do not know what I am talking about, please message me here, or on fb. I would be glad to go into more details. 

I have had a ton of songs go through my head writing this one but I keep coming back to Casting Crowns "Voice of Truth". Very truly what I had yesterday morning.

All this being said, as much as I am glad I got that time with God, I missed my friend yesterday and I know that God blesses our discussions as well-- hopefully we will return to our normal routine for the next trip in a couple of weeks!


 

Fear Thou Not

Isaiah 41:10, my favorite, I mean, VERY favorite, verse. Fear thou not, for I am with thee, be not dismayed for I am thy God. I will strengthen thee, yea, I will help thee. Yea, I will uphold thee on the right hand of thy righteousness.

I learned that verse when I was 12. The year before everything in my life started getting complicated. The year before my dad had his first heart attack, two years before he died and three years before my mom had a marathon stay in the hospital. Don't think for one minute that God's timing being perfect is wasted on me. I have known for years that He gave me that verse because I was going to need it.

Ironically, for some reason, I look back and realize that even though I think 12 was when life started getting hectic, maybe it has really been all my life and I was oblivious to a point. My mom was sick a lot when I was little. In fact, I know one of the first things I seriously worried about was what would we do if something happened to her. Believe you me, when Mom was in the hospital, my dad, my sister and I were on all out survival mode. She probably wasn't in there that long when I was little, but it felt like an eternity. I loved my dad, but he was definitely not a homemaker.

But somehow, that year I was 12, things changed. Our church was burnt down just a few days before I started the 6th grade. We ended up having church in the basement of our school. One Sunday morning, I went forward and accepted Christ as my Savior in that basement, which now is the town's firehouse. Yes, life in small town America is awesome; just have to say that.

Anyway, we had Vacation Bible School in the school. My mom and Vaneta Carr were our teachers. Back in those days, part of VBS was seeing just how many Bible verses you could memorize. Usually the one who had the most memorized at the end of the week got a special prize. I have to tell you that need to be the best at stuff kicked in from a very young age and I was always a strong contender for the prize, and won it more than once. My mom always made me explain my Bible verses so she would know I wasn't just repeating words, but was really taking it to heart. This verse told me not to be afraid, He will be with me no matter what, do not be dismayed. I always think of dismayed as a combination of sad and worried. But then it comes, not only that God is God, but that He will strengthen me and help me and hold me up with his righteousness. There are many times I need strength and help and to just be held up. God says, "No problem, I am here."

The following fall, my dad had his first heart attack, I repeated that verse over and over as we sat in the ICU waiting room. There were many dark days during that time and at one point in time the doctor sent us home because "the next few days are going to be rough". At 2 in the morning, the phone rang and Dad's heart had stopped. They were working on him and by the time we got there, they had him back. We realized then the doctor knew it was coming and wasn't expecting to bring him back. The next few days being rough was us getting though a funeral.

The next year, we did lose him. We had all held our breath for that year because even though my dad didn't want people to know it; the doctor had told us that he would more than likely have another heart attack and if he did, it would kill him. I think that was when I started learning there was a difference between worry and fear. I think so many times, we worry and what we were worried about never ends up happening anyway, or if it does, it doesn't happen the way we thought it would. Fear is something tangible. You are afraid of spiders, or you are afraid of death, or you are afraid of losing your dad. It isn't something far-fetched, it is something that you have been told there is a real likeliness it will happen.

With all that being said, God tells us He will take care of those fears, and He did. I'm not going to tell you going through losing my dad was easy. It was, and probably still is to this day, one of the hardest things I ever had to go through. I didn't go through it alone though. God was right there, and I felt him. And not only that, but He surrounded me with good friends that although they didn't know what I was going through at the time, they were there and that was what was important to me because I believe the biggest thing about fear is it is worse when you feel all alone.

Looking back though I do know those events did make me stronger, much stronger. And even though we had some scary days, God always provided and I have learned to remember that God never lies, and he always keeps His promises.

So when you are facing uncertain times, ask God to let you feel that help, He is there. I promise, but more importantly, He promises.

I do have to tell you, when that verse shows up in my life now, I start praying. People share things on the internet all the time, and every so often there will be Isaiah 41:10. Twice I have seen it several times within a few days. It makes me wonder if God is telling me to be prepared or to just pray for the one who posted it, which I do.  I lost a good friend a little over a year ago. Would you believe that the very last thing that she posted to facebook ended with Isaiah 41:10. It comforts me to know she felt God with her as well.

I thought Chris Tomlin's Whom Shall I Fear would be perfect, because let's face it, though I didn't say it above, the Devil himself is behind those fears. When we have to overcome fears and step out into the next step of our lives, God is there, and the Devil will always be defeated.